Last Sunday, I was enjoying a quiet evening with my husband; we were discussing about our personal and professional frontiers, and coming up with creative ideas on how to get past them. For what we deem as limits are only put forth by our own minds; the truth however is that the high sky is no limit anymore. I always keep one of these quotes (introduced to me by one of my dear friends) close to my heart - "Aim for the moon, you'll land amidst stars anyways!"
During the course of that enriching conversation was when the 5Ps emerged (Photo attached) - Nothing new in all of that; We've all read more and enough about each of these. But I always believe that knowledge and actually applying that to daily living are two very different things. If each of us even applied a single point everyday, I'm certain we'd all be better people. (Okay, enough of preaching!)
Another night shift ensued, and it was a Monday, one of the most dreaded days of the ED week. There are times when it's so crowded there's barely any space to squeeze between two patient trolleys! It's challenging and who doesn't like some adrenaline rush eh? It certainly seems all fancy on Grey's Anatomy, but when you're on that ED shop floor, and you're assigned patient after patient even before you've settled with the previous sick patient, there are times when you feel the floor underneath exists no more, you wish you could ask them to stop flooding in, you hope the next patient you've to see has easier veins to access for blood sampling so you wouldn't spend too much time there, which you'd rather use on getting history and examining the patient to gather clues about his/her illness and reaching at a provisional diagnosis and managing it, thus, actually helping the patient; but alas, you're stuck with a sick breathless patient with a probable severe pneumonia and acute heart failure and worsening kidney function who needs you more; the next not-so-sick patient with atypical chest pain has to wait before you can even get to him; the woman who keeps vomiting will get an injection to stop the retching and you reassure her you'll get to her in a very short while. In that chaos, you honestly don't have time to think too much about yourself, let alone listen to hunger pangs or bladder urgency calls!
Prior to the night shifts, I've often found myself anxious, to be honest. And as I've introspected, I've realised it's not about the stress of the work but actually the 'fear' of being late; for discipline in ED is paramount. I've never been late, so it's quite counter-intuitive why I would be anxious about it but as my better half pointed out, maybe the reason I'm never late is because of the fear/anxiety - point noted! And thus, he so very subtly, helped me empower myself to use this so-called anxiety to my advantage. It struck me how perception was so important. A single paradigm shift could actually work wonders.
There have been times, I've even questioned myself if there was in some way a lack of passion about what I was doing. I've even felt guilty for feeling thus. I mean, one spends years preparing for medical school and then finally having graduated out of medical college with that prestigious degree -a year later, you feel 'disillusioned' - that's shitty right? As a recent article on New York Times reiterated, our generation has had it all quite easy. We've had it all served to us on a silver plate! We've not had to struggle to feed ourselves, or fight for education rights. We've not had to live in homeless shelters and travel hundreds of miles to access healthcare. We've not faced extreme discrimination and slavery and have not had to fight for freedom. We've been immensely fortunate to have all the opportunities in life that we do and the least we can do, is make good use of them; for ultimately, passion isn't a fruit that's going to drop on our heads from a tree branch - it's the culmination of sheer hard work and continuous effort; the fruit of unconditional thoughtful action.
I so needed that kick at my back to shut all unnecessary questions in my idle mind and focus on the important things instead! So that was great and liberating, to say the least.
Post night shift, we had the Happy Tribe over for pizza party at our home. It was good fun listening to their work anecdotes, a welcome change from medical stories (which I shall gloat are the more exciting ones, any day ;)) We played this fun game called Perception (which may be, more often, far from reality) but just another cool way to reinforce the fact how it plays such a huge role in all our lives.
Mid-week, mum - dad were at the Art of Living Ashram as part of Alap Bangalore performing at the special Satsang on Sri Sri Ravi Shankar's (Guruji's) birthday. So post-evening shift, past midnight, we were watching the webcast and capturing screenshots! :D It was peaceful to just relive my times at the Ashram - the atmosphere is just filled with so much positivity, love and joy - just simply uplifting.
The following day was my dear dad's birthday. Family has and will always play a pivotal role in my life. The sacrifices my father has made for me are immense and the poignant truth is I wouldn't be where I am today if not for the unwavering support of my father. He led by example, to live by principles, of righteousness and sincerity. I've always been his princess but he always taught me to be tough on the inside. His unconditional love, his kindness and his faith in me are constant factors pushing my wings to fly higher... He's my friend, my go-to-person, my super-hero!
The rest of my evenings were with patients. I had a young looking 70yr+ old gentleman walk in, and I greeted him with "Wow! You look so young!" and he got back with "I'm not 17, like you!" He was a retired teacher and I've always enjoyed non-medical conversations with my patients. I find it easier to connect with them and I like to believe, they open up better with some casual talk.
I've had 80yr old beautiful ladies with dementia who couldn't stop telling my senior consultant that I was a "pretty" good doctor! Haha! How patients can make a doctor's day :P Simple pleasures ;)
Saturday brunch was to be a catch up session with the Strathmore folks. We were celebrating a friend's change of job - and instead, another friend ended up stealing the thunder by announcing he was getting hitched! We celebrated over yummy food at P.S. Cafe and I must say, the Mojitos with the basil leaf were simply awesome! Can't get it wrong with basil - yes it's one of my weak points - If it's Thai food, I'm always going to have the Basil Minced Chicken; if it's Italian, I'm always going to have the Basil Pesto Pasta! I do have my weaknesses- Sigh!
I missed the AIB stand up comedy session thanks to night shifts over the weekend. The husband had a good bout of laughter with the rest of the audience, while I was swarmed with patients :P But no complaints. :) Another week done!
A week of the emergence of 5Ps.
A week of 'learning, unlearning and relearning' about Passion.
A week of changing and refining Perception.
T-21wks
During the course of that enriching conversation was when the 5Ps emerged (Photo attached) - Nothing new in all of that; We've all read more and enough about each of these. But I always believe that knowledge and actually applying that to daily living are two very different things. If each of us even applied a single point everyday, I'm certain we'd all be better people. (Okay, enough of preaching!)
Another night shift ensued, and it was a Monday, one of the most dreaded days of the ED week. There are times when it's so crowded there's barely any space to squeeze between two patient trolleys! It's challenging and who doesn't like some adrenaline rush eh? It certainly seems all fancy on Grey's Anatomy, but when you're on that ED shop floor, and you're assigned patient after patient even before you've settled with the previous sick patient, there are times when you feel the floor underneath exists no more, you wish you could ask them to stop flooding in, you hope the next patient you've to see has easier veins to access for blood sampling so you wouldn't spend too much time there, which you'd rather use on getting history and examining the patient to gather clues about his/her illness and reaching at a provisional diagnosis and managing it, thus, actually helping the patient; but alas, you're stuck with a sick breathless patient with a probable severe pneumonia and acute heart failure and worsening kidney function who needs you more; the next not-so-sick patient with atypical chest pain has to wait before you can even get to him; the woman who keeps vomiting will get an injection to stop the retching and you reassure her you'll get to her in a very short while. In that chaos, you honestly don't have time to think too much about yourself, let alone listen to hunger pangs or bladder urgency calls!
Prior to the night shifts, I've often found myself anxious, to be honest. And as I've introspected, I've realised it's not about the stress of the work but actually the 'fear' of being late; for discipline in ED is paramount. I've never been late, so it's quite counter-intuitive why I would be anxious about it but as my better half pointed out, maybe the reason I'm never late is because of the fear/anxiety - point noted! And thus, he so very subtly, helped me empower myself to use this so-called anxiety to my advantage. It struck me how perception was so important. A single paradigm shift could actually work wonders.
There have been times, I've even questioned myself if there was in some way a lack of passion about what I was doing. I've even felt guilty for feeling thus. I mean, one spends years preparing for medical school and then finally having graduated out of medical college with that prestigious degree -a year later, you feel 'disillusioned' - that's shitty right? As a recent article on New York Times reiterated, our generation has had it all quite easy. We've had it all served to us on a silver plate! We've not had to struggle to feed ourselves, or fight for education rights. We've not had to live in homeless shelters and travel hundreds of miles to access healthcare. We've not faced extreme discrimination and slavery and have not had to fight for freedom. We've been immensely fortunate to have all the opportunities in life that we do and the least we can do, is make good use of them; for ultimately, passion isn't a fruit that's going to drop on our heads from a tree branch - it's the culmination of sheer hard work and continuous effort; the fruit of unconditional thoughtful action.
I so needed that kick at my back to shut all unnecessary questions in my idle mind and focus on the important things instead! So that was great and liberating, to say the least.
Post night shift, we had the Happy Tribe over for pizza party at our home. It was good fun listening to their work anecdotes, a welcome change from medical stories (which I shall gloat are the more exciting ones, any day ;)) We played this fun game called Perception (which may be, more often, far from reality) but just another cool way to reinforce the fact how it plays such a huge role in all our lives.
Mid-week, mum - dad were at the Art of Living Ashram as part of Alap Bangalore performing at the special Satsang on Sri Sri Ravi Shankar's (Guruji's) birthday. So post-evening shift, past midnight, we were watching the webcast and capturing screenshots! :D It was peaceful to just relive my times at the Ashram - the atmosphere is just filled with so much positivity, love and joy - just simply uplifting.
The following day was my dear dad's birthday. Family has and will always play a pivotal role in my life. The sacrifices my father has made for me are immense and the poignant truth is I wouldn't be where I am today if not for the unwavering support of my father. He led by example, to live by principles, of righteousness and sincerity. I've always been his princess but he always taught me to be tough on the inside. His unconditional love, his kindness and his faith in me are constant factors pushing my wings to fly higher... He's my friend, my go-to-person, my super-hero!
The rest of my evenings were with patients. I had a young looking 70yr+ old gentleman walk in, and I greeted him with "Wow! You look so young!" and he got back with "I'm not 17, like you!" He was a retired teacher and I've always enjoyed non-medical conversations with my patients. I find it easier to connect with them and I like to believe, they open up better with some casual talk.
I've had 80yr old beautiful ladies with dementia who couldn't stop telling my senior consultant that I was a "pretty" good doctor! Haha! How patients can make a doctor's day :P Simple pleasures ;)
Saturday brunch was to be a catch up session with the Strathmore folks. We were celebrating a friend's change of job - and instead, another friend ended up stealing the thunder by announcing he was getting hitched! We celebrated over yummy food at P.S. Cafe and I must say, the Mojitos with the basil leaf were simply awesome! Can't get it wrong with basil - yes it's one of my weak points - If it's Thai food, I'm always going to have the Basil Minced Chicken; if it's Italian, I'm always going to have the Basil Pesto Pasta! I do have my weaknesses- Sigh!
I missed the AIB stand up comedy session thanks to night shifts over the weekend. The husband had a good bout of laughter with the rest of the audience, while I was swarmed with patients :P But no complaints. :) Another week done!
A week of the emergence of 5Ps.
A week of 'learning, unlearning and relearning' about Passion.
A week of changing and refining Perception.
T-21wks
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