Party time in Pune

~ 83 weeks to my 'Tees' (30th) ~

As the weekend approached, we were packed and uber excited about our upcoming India trip. We were headed to Pune on our first ever direct flight from Singapore to Prantiks hometown. Ayaan was eager to meet his paternal grandparents too. We've met outside of Pune, quite a number of times, be it Switzerland for Prantik's 35th or Singapore/Bintan for New Year's more recently- but our last Pune visit with Ayaan was actually 2 years ago, which also coincided with his first rice eating ceremony, 'Annaprashan'. 

We landed in Pune, around midnight and were picked by Prantik's parents and uncle

from the airport.

Day 1 was spent chilling at home - always good to kickstart the vacation with our legs up, book in hand. Being Women's Day, mom-in-law and I treated ourselves to some spa time and then shopping. We called it a day, at a much-acclaimed Bengali restaurant, relishing some Kosha Mangsho and Mutton Biryani, with the parents' cultural gang. Even though it was way past his bedtime, baby Ayaan really enjoyed the baby pomfret fry! 

Next day, we headed to the DagduSheth Ganapati temple first and passed by ShaniwarWada, now even more famous, after some scenes from Bajirao Mastani were shot there! We then met some family friends at the Residency Club and chatted over Indo-Chinese Lunch.

Sunday morning, we headed to Prantik's old school: St. Vincent's high school - while Prantik and his parents had a good nostalgic stroll around the campus, Ayaan was busy picking dried leaves and gawking at the hawks and other birds flying around the playground. Brunch was at Marzorin - famous since over two score years, for its sandwiches and cold coffee. 

The same evening - both Prantik and I were in for a surprise. The parents had kindly arranged a social gathering with a large group of family friends. Little did we know, that they had very thoughtfully planned out a felicitation and congratulatory ceremony to honour me passing the MRCEM exam and Prantik's deal-signing! They had even designed mementoes for the two of us - mine in fact featured a sepia picture of 'Anandi Gopal', India's first female doctor (we had in fact, seen a recent Marathi feature film based on her life) to continue to inspire me to keep materialising my professional aspirations and dreams. Both of us were rendered touched and speechless by their heart-warming gesture! We did speak respectively to thank them, and the rest of our family and friends who've supported us through this journey thus far; while Ayu had a ball running around the green lawns, chasing puppies at Kamal Baug (where our reception and Ayaan's Annaprashan had previously been hosted). We did catch up with our friends and some cousins too - it was indeed a lovely evening, under the moonlight - to be cherished for long.

Monday was our last day in Pune - so we did some more shopping and had delicious home-cooked Bengali lunch before the packing frenzy ensued. That evening, we dressed up in shades of green (wardrobe courtesy: yours truly) and headed to Chingaari restaurant (rated as the 2nd best restaurant in India) to treat the folks, in celebration of our milestones. We clicked many a photo, at the beautiful lobby of the Sheraton Grand, posing away to our hearts' content and enjoyed good family time, bonding over food, drinks and Ayaan's mischievous exploits. 

Soon enough, the clock struck 12, and we were headed to the airport, with our packed bags and minds too packed with lovely memories from a short yet really sweet trip to Pune. Until next time!

Working Mom

~84 weeks to my 'Tees'(30th)~

This week was tough. I had mostly back to back evening shifts, and some commitments prior to or after my shifts which meant lesser time with Ayu through the day; and more guilt piling up.

This is not something new that I've had to deal with; even back when I had just resumed work, after my maternity leave, I remember silent tears rolling down my cheeks, which I swiftly wiped off, while inconspicuously traversing in the crowded MRT .. after a few months, Ayu was actually quite sweet and he would wish me well at the door, as I stepped out.
But things have changed since then.

Ayaan being a 2+ year old, has grown a mind of his own - and a big heart, full of big emotions. After the good morning hug, his first words nowadays are "Amma, no work"; I've tried various explanations including "I work, then we get money, then I can buy you cupcakes and lollipops!" - Epic Fail that was, 'cause he immediately retorted with "Don't want cupcakes! I want Amma!!" followed by a lot of bawling, which obviously tore my heart into a million more pieces. Sigh.

I battled everyday, and these are the softer battles, fought with one's own self and nothing anybody says can actually make one feel better. A lot of people tried though, to their credit. Prantik would even send me sweet pictures of Ayu playing, colouring and such - though it would make my heart lighter, knowing that he had forgotten all the drama from earlier, and was happily engaged in fun activities, with his dad - sometimes, that would add on to the guilt too - "Why wasn't I there...?"

But then, as Prantik pointed out very aptly - I was saving precious lives. Indeed - work was rather busy but fulfilling that week - so that helped me see beyond; and slowly but steadily, I crawled out of the deep dungeon of WorkingMom'sGuilt.
I am a mom, but I also am a doctor, a wife, a daughter, a friend, a person on my own ...
I probably measure myself against my mom, who gave 100% of her time and energy, in raising us children - and I finally realised times had changed since and I should refrain from such comparisons. While there is no way I can do what she did (be a stay-at-home mom and a rocking one that too!), simply because, I love what work I do - it most certainly is my Ikigai; at the same time, knowing that I'm giving my best, also makes me feel better. When I'm home, my phone is away, I engage fully with my little one and make every effort to make up for the time lost (if that were even possible!?). I often sacrifice me-time too (not too healthy in the long run) to spend more time with Ayaan. For there's nothing that gets me as high an endorphin rush as simply hugging, rolling and kissing my toddler. And so for now, other things can wait. I use the time when he's at playschool to catch up on stuff that I need to do; and sometimes, I let my hair down and just chill, maybe catch a drink with the ladies, go for a jog/do some yoga or just befittingly binge watch "Working Moms" on Netflix. For one can't love another if you don't love yourself first right?


The weekend was here soon enough; and celebration party#2 was slated that Saturday evening, with our other group of friends, aboard a yacht. We anchored at the Lazarus island, the HappyBoys popped some champagne, we munched on chicken drumlets and thin crust pizza, while watching the glazing sun disappear over calm waters. I held on tight to my toddler, who was slightly freaking out as the boat sped against crashing waters, and salty seawater splashed all over us - he eased out shortly and smiled away, in my arms; it was a perfect culmination to the week indeed. Deep within, I prayed dear Ayu would forgive me one day, and that he'll understand why I do what I do; and as he grows up, he'll love whatever it is he does (just the way I do) and know deep within, that Amma loves him so so much, way beyond the horizon; all my guilt thus, I dropped into the ocean - and I just soaked in the moment - toasting to milestones, to doing our best, to friendship, to happiness.

Done Deal

~85 weeks to my 'Tees'(30th)~

The week leading upto the signing of "D Deal" was one filled with anticipation and anxiety; Prantik and co. would stay up until wee hours of the night and leave for work early in the morning too. And so, when "D Day" dawned, it was exhilirating to say the least. I can't even begin to imagine, the thousands of thoughts that went across Rachit & Prantik's minds, and the rest of the partners and employees as well. To see one's baby stand up on it's own feet, be of value to others and be old enough to be married away - that is a heart-warming experience. So even though I was in between night shifts, we found our way to the Sofitel hotel at Sentosa, where the #HappyTribe was celebrating the success with the dear family - without whose undying support, this couldn't have been possible.

Prantik has shared his personal journey with Happy Marketer via a touching blogpost too; and just to reminsce about those days, back when they were only few employees, when they had just opened their Bangalore operations and when on a personal front, Prantik and I had just started dating was a truly nostalgic read. To now, seeing them sell their company to Dentsu via Merkle, on some occasions did leave my head reeling.

To celebrate, and have some us time over the weekend, we first booked ourselves at the Ocean Suite, at Sentosa. The view isn't that of the horizon afar, but a sneak peak into the S.E.A. - we had schools of fish, sharks and Manta rays for company all day and night! The duplex also had a jacuzzi and boy, we had a gala time with out little boy, splashing about, in the evening. For dinner we went to the adjoining Ocean Restaurant, and had lovely gourmet food for dinner, with splashing flavours - they also had ocean-themed baby plates and cutlery - and that was so cute!

Saturday we checked in to Shangri-La at Sentosa itself, where we were joined by our close group of friends, to celebrate the deal! In the evening, we chilled over cocktails at the Tanjong Beach Club, and beholded a gorgeous sunset, studded by silhouettes of the coconut trees. Later, we enjoyed the vast buffet dinner spread, back at the hotel; followed by some champagne popping, after our kids had been tucked in. Next day, after the sumptuous breakfast, we chilled at the beach and the pool but soon it was time to check out, and we really wanted to get back again, for more fun times together.

As the week ended, we were back home, to our favourite place, where nothing had changed. The deal or not, home reinforced the values that we grew up with - that money can buy a house, not a home; money can buy a lot of things but not health & peace of mind. So while we celebrated success and $$$ in our bank account, we basked in gratitude to be surrounded by loving and ever-encouraging family and friends, near and dear; and for good health and cheer.

Love & War

~ 86 weeks to my 'Tees' (30th) ~

Feb 14th 2019

Woke up on Valentine's Day to the news of the Pulwama suicide bomb attack - where 40 Indian CRPF personnel were martryed. On the day of love, our brothers who limitlessly loved the nation, lost their lives, to terrorism - 'twas a black day for all peace-crusaders...

A few words in their honour... 

A mother woke to her toddler's kisses

Another mother, her young son, she misses

A father got back with love gifts for the family

Another woke to news of melancholy

A daughter is ready to deck up in a red dress

Another will have to put her father's body to rest

A son is ready to head to school

Another's life is stolen, ahead of time, by terrorists, who think they're cool

A wife is welcomed by a colourful flower bouquet

Another's won't ever be the same, starting today

A baby is cuddled tight by its mother & father

An unborn one won't ever hear the voice of the latter

A sibling is jealous of his older brother 

Another vows to join the forces, just like their elder bro, martyred 

Us (4+1) in Ubud

~ 87 weeks to my 'Tees' (30th) ~

Ubud
Bali this time with out Bangalore friends, #SamRut

We checked into our picturesque 2-bedroom pool villa
and toasted to good times with coffee-tequila
The traditional art market was the girl's first stop
While the boys chilled together at the coffee shop
We walked across the beautiful Ubud palace ground then
Followed by a sumptuous meal, catching up over spicy cocktails, satay and Nasi Goreng
We enjoyed Gamelan music and dance, while waiting for our ride back, and the drizzle to subside
A day that started with yoga by the paddy fields, ended then with much-deserved spa-time






Oh what fun we had chilling in our villa pool
And exploring the nature trails around, so cool
Such pure joy cuddling our little toddler boy
Who loved eating satay, posing and acting coy
We were in awe beholding the beautiful rice terrace farms
Sipping on Kopi Luwak, while the clouds brewed up a storm
We headed to the highly recommended 'Hujan Local' for dinner
The food and ambience definitely blew us over
And soon it was time to head back already with our little cub
But not before spending the afternoon at the famed Potato Head beach club.

50 months since #SocialShaadi

~ 88 weeks to my 'Tees' (30th) ~

Prantik and I celebrated 50 months since our wedding on Feb 3rd, 2019.

The Friday leading up to the weekend, I surprised him post work in my scrub-pants and met him after his gym session, at a resto-bar in the city. We enjoyed good conversation, over some salads and delicious refreshing cocktails! 

Saturday evening was spent with our usual gang of friends along with another couple from the US, who stopped over at Singapore, on their way to India - we enjoyed Asian dinner, followed by drinks at the rooftop, laughing over stories from the past and mysteries of the future.

On Sunday i.e the 3rd of Feb - we stole some time, while the toddler indulged in his afternoon siesta, to catch a late matinee show of a Bollywood movie at the theatre; followed by coffee, chilling on the lawn. 

Just looking back at how far we've come since our wedding ceremonies, left us feeling giddy! 

We've had a fair share of ups and downs, like any other couple out there- but we've stuck together despite all the differences... and just as we've gotten older, we've also grown wiser (hopefully) and here's hoping that we continue on this roller-coaster journey together, learning to let go (of things that don't matter on the long run) and holding on, when required (to faith in ourselves and the higher Force, if one's a believer)

Ups/Downs

S = Surprises/Sarcasm

O = Optimism/Overcommitted

C = Companionship/Critical

I = Intimacy/Insecurities

A = Adventures/Assumptions

L = Love/Lack of empathy

S = Security/Scarcity of time

H = Home/Home alone

A = Affection/Anger

A = Ambition/Abrasiveness

D = Dancing together/Defensiveness

I = Infinite growth/Imperfections

These are personality as well as couple traits that do not get completely reflected on Social media posts - because by default, we are all narcissistic characters - and we'd only project the good side, editted pictures in good light, sans red eyes, with filters etc - but the truth is, we're all normal people, with our own idiosyncrasies and flaws. 

Marriage continues to teach us to focus inwards on personal growth continually, while also being considerate and giving towards the other half's (I do not say 'better half' because everyone is a different individual, and one mustn't compare apples to oranges!) journey of discovery and growth.

It is learning to enjoy the roller coaster ride, while maintaining our poise and striking the right balance.

It is learning to adapt to the changes that we undergo as time passes by, and finding our footing while the waves go by.

It is learning to take over new roles, doning invisible superhero/heroine capes even, and giving it our best; and at times, when we can't for whatever reason, falling back on our partner, and being able to rely on them ... and at the end of the day, looking back and being able to smile together, at a job well done - be it setting our house up, cooking a meal, raising our toddler and such. 

It's been a fantastic 50 months with you, Prantik; we've seen each other through some tough and rough times; we've danced through the good times and well, we've had some jolly good - great times too - may we continue to be grateful for the blessings that continue to be showered upon us; may we never take each other for granted; and may we continue on this beautiful journey, hand in hand, until they get crooked from senile arthritis, until you lose all your hair, mine grey beyond repair, and we fall asleep cuddling one night, reminiscing about the days, months and decades we've spent together, and pass onto the next world, in peace...

Dear Mamama ...

~ 89 weeks to my 'Tees' (30th) ~

The most important thing the past week has got to be mum leaving for good ... and so after 2.3 years of helping us look after not just Ayaan, but also our household and ourselves - Amma was finally flying off to be with Papa (finally an end to their 'Baghban' like long-distance situation) and now we were on our own! The house did feel empty, but our hearts were full, and heavy...

Thus, I decided to pen this not-so-little poem, on behalf of the little one: An ode to our wonder-woman! :*

Dear Mamama...

Thank you Mamama
For running behind Amma
Being wheeled off on the hospital trolley
As you witnessed your prayers being answered
And set your eyes for the first time on me

Thank you Mamama
For taking me in your arms, even past midnight
And rocking me to sleep
Singing "Nanda ke laala" so melodiously
Until I drifted into my dreamworld, deep

Thank you Mamama
For taking care of Amma
So she could breastfeed me exclusively
For being so persevering, when Amma headed back to work
And you had to at times even force spoon/bottle feed me

Thank you Mamama
For recording all my first milestones
Be it my first smile, giggle or boisterous laugh
Or me sliding, crawling and cruising - my first steps
Even my fussy crying, when you'd all had enough! :D

Thank you Mamama
For teaching me my first syllables, letters and words
And soon we were singing my first nursery rhymes together
It's no wonder that 'Mamama' was amongst my first few words
Especially as we spent so much time with each other

Thank you Mamama
For taking me outdoors daily, and running behind me
We would see the koi fish, and play with Ashley the cat, seek and hide
Collect dried leaves and flowers; or go to the "sp(l)ash zone"
And when older, watch me climb up and down the slide

Thank you Mamama
(&Ajjo) for "so many many" gifts from Jakarta and elsewhere
For filling my wardrobe with the softest cotton clothes
Umpteen books, which I get Amma-Baba to re-read
And my tricycle, and my latest scooter, to speed away, I suppose?

Thank you Mamama
For letting me do yoga with you
Merely a "copycat" but it felt nice anyways
Even breathing as you and Ajjo did during 'Bhastrika pranayama'
Climbing on you, and hugging you "G'morning" while you were doing your asanas!

Thank you Mamama
For being my serene moonlight and morning sunshine
And teaching me to greet the cleaner aunty and the security/driver uncle with glee
Also, for teaching me to be kind and share
So now all my friends (and their nannies) love me

Thank you Mamama
For making me love food, fruits and veggies, in all its vast variety
Especially with all the yummy meals you cooked
My faves till date: 'puttu' with banana, 'sabudana', Chocolate cake
"d(r)agon fruit", carrot "(cha)pati", and broccoli, slightly undercooked

Thank you Mamama
For teaching me the value of prayer
And bowing down to the Almighty everyday
Now, I can do "puja" on my own ;)
And chant in tune, all alone, "Om Namah Shivaya"

Thank you Mamama
For teasing me and tickling me
And making me laugh, by saying you'll pull my ears
For all the great times together and being there for me,
Amma & Baba, over the last couple of years

Thank you Mamama
For dressing me up and treating me as your little Krishna
To me, much like a second mother (Yashoda) you've been
You've fed me, bathed me, changed me, not once, scolded me
Always dropped and picked me from school, even if unwell, you'd been

Thank you Mamama
For teaching nanny #1 & #2
The way to my favourite "another park" and playschool
And to my heart too with my fav "One Fish Two Fish" tshirt
And "my tummy", with my fav foods too - you're too cool!

Thank you Mamama
For sacrificing your time, which you could have spent with Ajjo/Mamu
To help Amma-Baba look after me
For sacrificing sleep, and alot of me-time
In exchange for a lot of quality time with me

Thank you Mamama
For being my "Mogach" (favourite person) in this world
For being the epitome of unconditional love and kindness
I hope we get to chill together, often in the future too
But until then, all these cherishable times, I'll definitely miss

"Love you so much"
Ayu ...

P.S. I'll share my Lollipo(p)k with you when you FaceTime next ...